Nick Fury, Mother Fuckers!

topgovernmentagent:

I am never getting drunk with Fury again.

Oh, why not?

After falling from the window,

Fury went home. He cleaned his cuts, put on fresh pants, and went to bed. Unfortunately though, he couldn’t sleep, since he couldn’t get the thought of Loki, that wondrous gleaming bundle of angst out of his head.

lokiwantshiswoobie:

baldrgodofemotes:

shieldmotherfucker:

lokiwantshiswoobie:

It was the most relaxing night Loki had for a long time.

All the lights were off, the only thing that illuminated the room was the soft glow of the TV. He was covered in blankets with Alexander curled up right beside him. The god shoved a spoonful of mint ice cream in his mouth while he continue to laugh at the mortals on this ridiculous program.

Fury waited outside Banner’s apartment all day, watching the inhabitants come in and out, until he knew Loki was home alone. Once he was, Fury ran quickly up the stairs, Kicked open the door, and headed towards the living room.

Balder glanced up at the crash caused by the door swinging into the wall. He sighed and got up from his bed, leaving his guitar and messy stacks of notes on music theory where they lay.

He glanced out of the room to see…the director of SHIELD? Balder grimaced. Not today. Not in the cursed state he knew the mortal to be in. He approached the man from behind and tapped his shoulder to get his attention. 

And then picked him up bodily and threw him out the window with as much force as he dared use. 

“Thanks for that.” he motioned at Balder, shoving ice cream in his mouth, not even bothering to look up from the TV.

He was getting used to Fury’s attempts to jump him. He wasn’t exactly a threat, he was just kind of more annoying now. Like I fly that just wouldn’t go away.

Fury was so intent on the succulent blueberry wonder in front of the T.V. that he didn’t notice the younger god barreling towards him. “ShitFuckDamn!” He thought to himself when the smelly one picked him up. He was more startled when It threw him out the window. Even more so was the fact that he was conscious when he hit the ground. Fury decided to lay there for a moment or to, since no one was around.

lokiwantshiswoobie:

It was the most relaxing night Loki had for a long time.

All the lights were off, the only thing that illuminated the room was the soft glow of the TV. He was covered in blankets with Alexander curled up right beside him. The god shoved a spoonful of mint ice cream in his mouth while he continue to laugh at the mortals on this ridiculous program.

Fury waited outside Banner’s apartment all day, watching the inhabitants come in and out, until he knew Loki was home alone. Once he was, Fury ran quickly up the stairs, Kicked open the door, and headed towards the living room.

lokiwantshiswoobie:

shieldmotherfucker:

baldrgodofemotes:

lokiwantshiswoobie:

baldrgodofemotes:

lokiwantshiswoobie:

Where is the highest bridge in this city?

I believe it is over the Narrows, but I might be mistaken. 

It looked fairly high, in any case. :/ I would not recommend such extreme behaviors, however. 

At least someone is capable of giving me a straight answer.

If you need me, I will be splattered at the bottom of it.

Is that entirely necessary? 8I I…cannot heal that. And I am fairly sure that most who might be able to are not in this realm. :B

I can! I have a special appendage for that.

I hate you.

That’s okay, Lover. I have enough lust for the both of us.

baldrgodofemotes:

lokiwantshiswoobie:

baldrgodofemotes:

lokiwantshiswoobie:

Where is the highest bridge in this city?

I believe it is over the Narrows, but I might be mistaken. 

It looked fairly high, in any case. :/ I would not recommend such extreme behaviors, however. 

At least someone is capable of giving me a straight answer.

If you need me, I will be splattered at the bottom of it.

Is that entirely necessary? 8I I…cannot heal that. And I am fairly sure that most who might be able to are not in this realm. :B

I can! I have a special appendage for that.